Thankful for Melissa Foster's Two-Posts-in-One |

Escape the Gratitude vs Platitude Trap

November is the typical month for giving thanks, spreading good will, and appreciating the things in life that you have. However, for women business owners, every month is the time to show gratitude, and unfortunately, many of us also spread platitudes without even realizing it.

I’m sure you can think of the many ways you show thanks to your clients and your families. They probably range from the simple, “Thank you” to generous gifts and meaningful hugs. But do you ever give thought to how much you mean your thank yous? Are they said with your heart behind them or are they empty words? Platitudes perhaps?

So many of us smile as a natural reaction, or perhaps a learned reaction, when a client has taken the time to speak with us or ordered from our businesses. Has your smile lost any of its sincerity? Do you find yourself smiling and really thinking, “Come on, already. I have three more important things to be doing”?

A platitude is a pointless, unoriginal, or empty comment or statement (yes, a facial expression is a statement) made as though it was significant. Many comments of gratitude often fall into this category, such as:

Thank you!

That was so nice!

I couldn’t have asked for more!

These are not always meaningless or insignificant comments, but they are likely thrown around much more often than they are really felt. Here are a few ways to say things that you really mean.

Think before you thank. For example, if you were on the phone with a client and your are wrapping up the conversation, do you want to say thank you for their time, their business, their advice? Wrap what you really mean into the thank you, it will be much more sincere and your client will certainly appreciate the difference.
Before you appreciate a nicety, what made the effort the person made “nice”? Was it the time they gave you, the thoughtfulness that went into the effort, or perhaps someone went above and beyond what was called for. Again, spread your gratitude wisely and with an explanation.
Could you really have asked for more? Did you ask for something in the first place? Are you being given a gift because it is a holiday or birthday or for no specific reason? Is your client/family member really saying thank you to you with the gift? Slow down and analyze what you appreciate. If you are receiving a gift for a special occasion, perhaps gratitude for their remembering the occasion is in order.

Being thankful is important in our lives. Spreading good will can only invoke the same in others. But falling into the platitude trap because you feel you are supposed to be grateful can be more harmful to your business than beneficial. Take your time. Think before you thank, and mean what you say!

—Melissa Foster

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BUT WAIT—there’s more!

Besides offering a great post on thankfulness, Melissa Foster has a new release, Come Back to Me, that readers are calling “a gift” and her “best book yet.” I’ve read Chasing Amanda and Megan’s Way, and I agree. Her character driven story takes readers on an emotional journey where you’re thinking and most likely crying long after the last page.

What I like about Come Back to Me is you can’t guess the ending. When I find something like that I call it the “LA Law” ending because that was the one show back in the day where I never saw the ending coming. It defied everything you expected to happen and I found it brilliant (for those that need to know the episode, it was the one where Roslyn was talking with Leland, stepped in the elevator, and the elevator was broken. There was no floor. Roslyn fell to her death.)

Anyway, that’s how I view Melissa’s writing with her latest. I won’t tell you the ending but it isn’t what you think. At all. I definitely could picture this as a Lifetime Movie or something on screen that would grab your heart in the beginning and refuse to let go.

Here is more on Come Back to Me:

Tess Johnson has it all: her handsome photographer husband Beau, a thriving business, and a newly discovered pregnancy. When Beau accepts an overseas photography assignment, Tess decides to wait to reveal her secret–only she’s never given the chance. Beau’s helicopter crashes in the desert.

Tess struggles with the news of Beau’s death and tries to put her life back together. Alone and dealing with a pregnancy that only reminds her of what she has lost, Tess is adrift in a world of failed plans and fallen expectations. When a new client appears offering more than just a new project, Tess must confront the circumstances of her life head on.

Meanwhile, two Iraqi women who are fleeing honor killings find Beau barely alive in the middle of the desert, his body ravaged by the crash. Suha, a doctor, and Samira, a widow and mother of three young children, nurse him back to health in a makeshift tent. Beau bonds with the women and children, and together, with the help of an underground organization, they continue their dangerous escape.

What happens next is a test of loyalties, strength, and love.

A caveat for those who prefer not to read profanity in their books, there is strong language contained in Come Back to Me.

To purchase Come Back to Me, click here.

I received a copy of Come Back to Me from the author in exchange for my participation in her blog tour.

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