Character Confession: Real Words with Friends
Words. Even without my writing life, I keep thinking about what we say to each other. How we say it. The motivation behind our words. With sickness and death in our lives of late, I can’t help but wonder what words would be said about me once I’m gone.
Thinking about the deaths around me recently, I summed up my mother-in-law with the words family and unconditional love. For a friend, everything he did was Christ like. He was a servant. Those aren’t just words but legacies they leave behind.
The Bible has a lot to say about words, and the verse I try to be intentional about comes from Proverbs 18:21:
The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences. (NLT)
Before I allowed Christ in my life as a relationship, my words were laced with poison. I didn’t have a lot of nice things to say, and I felt triumph when I knew my words hurt. That was the woundedness and lack of forgiveness in my life at work, and they were words of death. Although both sexes can bring about life and death with their words, women definitely dip their words in blood. I know. I can be one of them.
One of the cattiest examples I remember was years ago on Melrose Place. Heather Locklear’s character needed to borrow an outfit and Courtney Thorne-Smith’s character offered her closet. Heather Locklear’s dialogue was something like, “Well thank you, I’ll see if there is anything I can wear, even though I’m sure it will be too big on me.” Just a little dig, but a deadly one.
Facebook is definitely full of words, and sadly, my feed has its share of words of death. I’ve watched Facebook friends claw each other with status updates and responses. The words swirling around the Facebook water cooler over the first installment of The Bible Series made me sad. Such negativity. I shared my thoughts over at Christians Read and one of the commenters stated that the actor playing Jesus was very upset at the criticisms and barbs Christians were lobbing at each other and the people behind the series. Life and death. It’s a serious thing.
I want my words to be about life. It is a choice. It is not natural for me to love and be positive. That is Christ in me. I fail often. Encouraging someone that I know has rejected me isn’t easy. But I know if negativity breeds negativity, I want to start a forest fire with positive words. I don’t let opportunities pass to let someone know I believe in them. They are a treasure. They are captivating. They can get the job done. They are not beyond hope. They matter.
My prayer is that when it is time to eulogize me, the words come easy for those around me. That I’ve given them plenty to say, and that they be words of life. Not because I was a doormat or perfect, because I don’t find that to be the case. But that I take my tongue, my words, my mission, and my friends seriously. That those around me are better because they heard from me they were worthy.
Because you are.
